Decisions

Decisions

Dorinda lay sick in bed. Her hour was near. For days she had been seeing them. The dark beast ready to devour her and the light angel ready to welcome her. It would be a battle but not now. They each sat on a side of the bed, patiently waiting.

'How do I do this?', Dorinda thought desperately. No one could prepare you for this. 'If I were to say anything to the nurses or volunteers they'd think I was being delirious.'

She remembered her grandmother. She had been sick in the hospital but had often panicked, pulled out the IV, taken the tubes out of her nose and ran away. They'd find her hiding in a corner. It drove the nurses crazy. Eventually, they tied her to the bed. 'Was this what she was seeing?', Dorinda wondered. 'If we had known, could we have done anything different?'.

She must have drifted off to sleep. When she awoke, her friend Tamara was there. "Hey, when did you get here?", Dorinda whispered. Her throat was so sore now, it wouldn't allow much more. Tamara smiled, "I got here while you were snoring. I could hear you all the way down the hall."

Dorinda made the wheezing sound that had replaced her laugh. "You're... such an... idiot... Tamara." "Obviously, only an idiot would keep fools for company." Dorinda cracked up. Puffing and rasping, she nearly choked. Tamara looked worried. Dorinda hated that. She had wanted to laugh, had needed it.

Tamara moved to the other side of the bed to hand her a glass of water. It was tepid but still eased her throat. She saw Tamara shiver as she help the cup for her. She knew Tamara couldn't see the beast. But her friend had always been sensitive to things like that.

"Hey Tamara,... do you... do you believe angels and... demons, they... they fight for your soul?", she managed. "I don't know. I mean, I do believe in Guardian Angels but I'm not sure like, what they do? I mean they're supposed to protect you so I guess battling demons for your soul could be part of the job description. Why do you ask?"

Dorinda hesitated. They had talked about things like this before. Tamara was one of the few people she could have this conversation with. Still, saying it out loud made her feel... more vulnerable. She scrunched her face. "Are you hurting? Do you need me to get you anything?"

Again with that solicitous look in her eyes. This wasn't how their friendship was supposed to be. They were young, they should have been dancing at the club or doing whatever. Anything but this. Dorinda shook her head. "Not hurting just... I can see them."

"See who?" "The angel and the demon. They uhm... they're on my bed.", she said. "Oh. Well. I guess it's a good thing I sat in that chair over there then. Wouldn't want to be in their way.", Tamara replied. "They're not... doing anything.... They just.... watch."

"Do you want me to pray for you?", Tamara asked. Dorinda nodded. They didn't belong to the same religion any more. But to Dorinda that didn't matter much. It was soothing when people prayed for her. Tamara's voice took on that quality that came with set prayers that were often repeated. The rhythm carried Dorinda away.

When she woke up again, night had fallen. The room was dark and quiet. It took her awhile to notice what was wrong. The lights of the machines, the steady beeping of the heart monitor. They were no longer there. She looked around and saw herself far off. The machine monitoring her heart was still going somewhere but it no longer seemed to be in the same space as her.

She didn't look too closely at the bed. She knew her body would still be in there. The angel and demon were no where to be seen. 'I wonder where they went', she thought. "I'm right here". The angel appeared at her side. "Can I go with you now?", Dorinda asked. "Is that what you want?", the angel said.

Dorinda nodded, "Don't you have to fight the other one?". "Not any more." "But you guys never even moved, what happened?", Dorinda said. The angel shrugged, "You had a choice and you made it. Shall we go?" It extended a hand to her. For a moment, it seemed like the hand wasn't there at all. Then it slowly came back into view.

Trusting people had never been her strong point. Then again, angels weren't exactly people were they? Dorinda watched as the hand cycled in and out of view. When it started to fade she reached out and took it, hoping this would be for the best.

                                                   *******

So this story started when I went to a writing cafe last monday and got a postcard featuring H.R. Giger's Death and was told to write about the image for 5 minutes straight. I thought it might be nice for the blog so there you have it. I hope you enjoyed it.

Death by H.R. Giger